Happy Birthday, Facebook… Now, Change the World

• Feb 10th, 2009
• Posted by Ron Schott
• Posted in Facebook, Social Media, Uncategorized

Happy birthday, Facebook.

If you were a human you’d be in half-day kindergarten, still taking scheduled naps. You’d have 5 friends who consist of your two neighbors, a weird kid that you met on the bus your first day and your two older brothers who made you eat dirt. The only thing expected of you would be that you tie you shoes (sometimes) and can go to the restroom by yourself at the supermarket. You’d be blowing out the candles on a huge cake with your friend and family around, wishing for that Nintendo DS.

But you’re not a human; you’re a super-charged juggernaut of a social networking site born from the womb of an Ivy League institution. Your friends number in the millions, or 150 million active users to be almost exact. Every day more and more is expected of you as those millions of friends share their life stories on your pages (but still expect increasing security). So, instead of blowing out five glowing candles, you get to listen to every self-proclaimed social media expert pick apart the last five years of your existence and plot your eventual demise.

Look how cute you were: http://web.archive.org/web/20040212031928/http://www.thefacebook.com/.

What will we ask of you next? I’m sure we’ll think of something.